Friday, September 11, 2009

Finding Beauty

Last year in preparation for my birthday, I made a declaration to face my fears. A promise I made to myself and any who’d listen. I chose things that I was consciously afraid of and went after them to face and feel it all.

Within weeks I was out of acting, got a writing agent to support the book inside of me, sang my heart out to find my voice, and accepted I was on a track to really embrace my work as s psychic medium.

I was proud of myself, felt I had kicked some ass and gotten over a few hurdles, however that was no comparison to the rest of this year that relentlessly reminded me of my promise.

I had opened up a can of worms. The promise developed a life of its own. It would not be denied and unwittingly revealed my fears that were, well, not so ….conscious.

If you were to ask yourself right now, what you are afraid of, and then spend the next 12 months facing that, you might click off this site, turn on the TV, call a friend to try and expunge the thought out of your head, but, the truth of consciousness is more beautiful to see despite how ugly it can seem.

In the midst of this exploration I remembered a vision I have been given on a previous birthday.

I heard what I call God, ask me “what would you do if I gave you a shinny red apple for your birthday Marla? I responded “well Lord I would be grateful for such a nutritious beautiful food, I would be delighted in its beauty” , and then I heard, "But what if the apple was rotting and filled with worms? “ I paused, furrowed my brow and said, “ Well, I would wonder why you would give me a rotting apple”.

Then I heard, just because it is rotting, is it not still beautiful? The worm knows it to be, and the seeds that will soon fall, will produce a another great tree that will bear delicious fruit, feed many and be harbor and shade for what I have created”. But Lord, do I have to eat it?”, "No Marla, just understand that if I give you a rotten apple filled with worms, you are to see the truth of what I give you and find the beauty. "

Interesting that the apple could represent the truth, knowledge and wisdom that is our intuitive birthright, instead of the fear and seduction cloaked in the serpent of unconsciousness.

Are we willing to make the promise to see it all and find the beauty?